Rob

Hometown: Bergenfield, NJ (pre-1979 ) & Bennington, VT
Positive Since: October 15, 1985
Relationship Status: Single
Age: 44
Favorite Book: “Dune” by Frank Herbert

As the eldest of four brothers, I was born in Cobleskill, NY in late December back in ‘63. When I was three months old, my family moved to Bergenfield, New Jersey (a suburb of New York City) where I was raised in a three family house with my mother, brother, grandparents, three aunts, uncle and two cousins. My grandmother was the matriarch of the family. She more than made up for my lack of a father by being my second mother and parent since my parents divorced when I was about three. My mother’s younger sisters also helped raise me.

My early childhood was filled with large family dinners and holidays spent together. I look back on these years with great appreciation for the love that was shared and the importance of family that my grandmother instilled in all of us. My mother remarried when I was ten to a man who was, ironically, as homophobic as my biological father. Throughout my childhood, I helped my mother take care of my younger brothers and assisted her in carrying out the household chores. I started working when I was eleven by taking on a paper route and bagging groceries at a local store. I was also very active musically as a child, playing bassoon and piano from the age of nine onwards. I attended two performing arts programs during my freshman year of high school, in both Ft. Lauderdale and Manhattan, and then moved to Bennington, Vermont with my mother’s clan, where I finished my last three years of high school.

I took standard college preparatory courses during high school and, after much vacillation between music and psychology during my senior year, I decided to pursue a degree in music. I attended Westminster Choir College in Princeton, New Jersey and graduated in May 1986 with a Bachelor of Music degree in Music Education and Organ. I also became certified to teach K-12 music in New Jersey.

I was a senior in college when I tested positive for HIV in October 1985. I had gone clubbing in Manhattan with a guy from school that I’d been messing around with and we didn’t play it safe. About three days later, I developed a high fever and went to the health clinic at Princeton University where I was told to get tested for HIV because I had all the symptoms of mono but the throat culture came back negative.